Search Results
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#1980 Up↑ /78 Down↓ [Report] 2011-06-14 21:38 EDT
// Dr. Li wants to take a class picture, because he received flowers from the students. Mr. Orlando is taking the picture in the hallway.
Dr. Li: You move here, you move here...
Dr. Li: Male students! Kneel in front! Second line is female students, and third line is...whatever.
*Dr. Li spends five minutes rearranging the students*
Dr. Li: Okay, ready for picture.
Mr. Orlando: 1...2...
Dr. Li: Take three pictures! The more the better!
Mr. Orlando: Okay, 1...2...
Dr. Li: Take at different angles!
*Warning bell rings*
Dr. Li: Ahh, no! -
#1837 Up↑ /107 Down↓ [Report] 2011-04-03 09:37 EDT
// Learning about diluted solutions
Mr. Orlando: So. you have this glass of Kool-Aid. And you're about to drink it. But then your friend comes along, thirsty, and says, "You know, I think the only thing that was satisfy my thirst would be a glass of Kool-Aid!" What would you do?
Mr. Orlando: Well, the Republican answer would be, "I'll drink the Kool-Aid because I earned it! My friend can drink water."
Mr. Orlando: The Communist answer is, "I, Mr. Orlando, am supreme ruler, and I get all the Kool-Aid. You, my underlings, get meager rations of water."
Mr. Orlando: The Democratic answer is, "Let's pour half the Kool-Aid down the drain and ration what's left!"
Mr. Orlando: That's your lesson in politics for the day. -
#1479 Up↑ /92 Down↓ [Report] 2010-10-28 17:27 EDT
// Mr. Orlando is talking about chemical reactions that generate heat.
Student: Couldn't you use them for a heat source, then?
Mr. Orlando: No! That's like saying...
Mr. Orlando: *in a sad voice* I'm cold.
Mr. Orlando: *in a hopeful voice* I have a grenade! -
#1316 Up↑ /120 Down↓ [Report] 2010-05-19 19:45 EDT
// Chemistry class, Regents Review
Jay: You should write "Chem is #1" on the board. Seriously. I promise Mr. Geller won't come.
Orlando: Oh, is this like Bloody Mary? You write "Chem is #1", say it three times, close the lights, and Mr. Geller will be behind you with a red pen.
...
// Orlando left the room during passing to scan practice tests
Jay: Let's put that theory to the test.
*Jay proceeds to write "CHEM IS #1" on the blackboard* -
#1271 Up↑ /72 Down↓ [Report] 2010-05-13 00:24 EDT
Mr. Orlando: So if you take away one thing from this course, I hope it's this...
Mr. Orlando: When you're at a high school party and some kid offers you wine, you can say, "Ewww, that's yeast poo, yeast burps, and yeast corpses. I don't want to drink that!"
Mr. Orlando: And the kid will say, "You know what? You're right!" and dump it out.
Mr. Orlando: And that's fermentation. YAY! -
#1198 Up↑ /170 Down↓ [Report] 2010-05-01 23:05 EDT
// Mr. Orlando summarizes Twilight during lab by having a conversation with himself
Mr. Orlando: *in a squeaky voice* "But I LOOOOVE you!"
Mr. Orlando: "But I'm a Vampire..."
Mr. Orlando: "But I LOOOVE you!"
Mr. Orlando: "But...I want to drink your blood..."
Mr. Orlando: "But I LOOOOOVE you!" -
#1175 Up↑ /79 Down↓ [Report] 2010-04-30 10:13 EDT
Mr. Orlando: Okay, let's talk about rust.
Student: How about the Statue of Liberty.
Mr. Orlando: How about it... The Statue of Liberty arrives in America crimson-colored. She gets wet...
*whole class bursts out laughing*
Mr. Orlando: I did not mean it that way, I did not mean to offend anybody.
Student: This is going on Stuybash! -
#926 Up↑ /61 Down↓ [Report] 2009-12-30 17:12 EST
Student: Mr. Orlando, did you know you really look like this kid, Isaac?
Mr. Orlando: I don't know who that is...
Student: Well I told Isaac that and he said "I'll be on the lookout for a handsome and tall teacher"
Mr. Orlando: Awww. Thank you.
Student: No, I didn't...
Student: *sigh* You're welcome. -
#728 Up↑ /78 Down↓ [Report] 2009-10-06 22:15 EDT
// Mr. Orlando in the hallway with Magic cards
Student: Hey! I saw you last time in the staircase with a deck, but you denied it!
Mr. Orlando: *cards in hand* No, that has definitely never happened!
Mr. Orlando: And I definitely don't have more than one!
Mr. Orlando: *proceeds to pull out three decks*
