Search Results
-
#586 Up↑ /151 Down↓ [Report] 2009-05-21 22:39 EDT
Mr. Citron: Wearing nail polish is dangerous, because paramedics need to check your fingertips for oxygen deprivation if you get in an accident. And then, if you're wearing nail polish, they just assume you're oxygen deprived and hook you up to the tank, and then sue you for unnecessary procedures or something, all because you were wearing nail polish.
Girl: But it looks pretty!
Mr. Citron: Wearing nail polish is like covering yourself in ketchup and then getting shot. -
#498 Up↑ /43 Down↓ [Report] 2009-04-06 20:03 EDT
// Mr. Citron describes how T-cells are activated
Mr. Citron: It's like if you pour soda on me and I turn into--
Guy: SUPERCITRON!
Mr. Citron: -- a pink flowergirl. OOIIILOOIALOIOILIIOAII!!! Or then, if you pour beer on me and I turn--
Guy: SUPERCITRON!
Mr. Citron: --into this big, burly Irish guy.
Other dude: Why they always gotta be Irish.
Mr. Citron: Okay, a guy from, um, Greenland. Nobody's from Greenland. There are like three people in Greenland.
Girl: Really?
Mr. Citron: Yes, that's what I heard. But anyway, do you get the concept? Soda, and I become a flowergirl, OIOOILOAIOLIOALOI, beer, RARRRRR tough guy.
Guy: NO! SUPERCITRON! NO! -
#352 Up↑ /104 Down↓ [Report] 2009-01-27 21:42 EST
// Learning about head lice in Human Diseases class
Mr. Citron: And does anyone here actually share combs and hairbrushes with people? Because that's not sanitary!
Student: Well, what if we share them with like, our parents?
Mr. Citron: Let me tell you something. Your parents are disease vessels. Treat them accordingly.
