Stuybash.org: Random Quotes

Random Quotes

#28 Up↑ +30/60 Down↓ [Report] 2008-09-22 23:51 EDT

Mr. Majewski: Kevin, Joseph, stop doing something under the desk!
David: I know what they're doing! It's really disgusting!

Tags: majewski physics
#561 Up↑ +15/41 Down↓ [Report] 2009-05-16 18:32 EDT

// Talking about different countries and flags in Spanish class
Sr. Garcia: ¿Como es la bandera Italiano?
Scott: Es roja..., blanca..., y... verduras!

// TRANSLATION
Mr. Garcia: What is the Italian flag like?
Scott: It's red..., white..., and... vegetables!
// He was looking for "verde"

Tags: flags garcia
#296 Up↑ +150/166 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-20 17:36 EST

Sr. Simon: Why won't you get flowers for your girl, Kenneth?
Kenneth: Uh...
Sr. Simon: Too expensive? You can just steal 'em from the cemetery like I used to!

Tags: cemetery flowers simon spanish
#622 Up↑ +50/58 Down↓ [Report] 2009-06-09 16:42 EDT

// Comp Gov presentations. Korea is presenting, to be followed by Japan
Student: Then, Korea was invaded and conquered by Japan.
Mr. Polazzo: If you're not careful with the time it's going to happen again.

Tags: comp.gov japan korea polazzo
#1096 Up↑ 0/66 Down↓ [Report] 2010-03-25 20:18 EDT

Bess: Physics sucks!
Donin: Plus mark!

Tags: donin
#719 Up↑ +106/116 Down↓ [Report] 2009-10-04 17:55 EDT

History teacher: And Rule 3 is: Don't do anything to get me fired!
Student: Can you give us an example of what you mean?
History teacher: How much do you know about the missionary position?

Tags: history sex
#1129 Up↑ +178/188 Down↓ [Report] 2010-04-11 22:50 EDT

Mr. Orlando: Guys, learn how to cook. Girls, find a guy that knows how to cook.
Student: Yeah, I heard girls really dig chefs.
Mr. Orlando: THAT IS DEFINITELY NOT TRUE, because I am a master in the kitchen...

Tags: chemistry cooking orlando
#386 Up↑ +53/69 Down↓ [Report] 2009-02-11 20:46 EST

// After listening comprehension
Dr. Barrow: So what did that sentence say?
Student: J'ai pris une bouche. [I took a mouth]
Dr. Barrow: No! It was J'ai pris une douche! [I took a shower]
Student: I'm pretty sure it said bouche.
Dr. Barrow: No! Douche, douche, douche, douche, douche!!

Tags: barrow douche french
#1275 Up↑ +15/33 Down↓ [Report] 2010-05-13 20:23 EDT

Ms. Breslin: How many people know Helen Keller, Miracle Worker?
*Very few hands are raised*
Ms. Breslin: How many people know the story?
*A few more hands are raised*
Ms. Breslin: *looks around, disappointed* ...How many people are about to make a Helen Keller joke?

Tags: ap.english.metaphysics breslin helen.keller
#1966 Up↑ +45/59 Down↓ [Report] 2011-06-13 22:29 EDT

// David Sugarman describes something as being "real complex"
Milo: I just need to make a math joke: real complex is an oxymoron.

Tags: david.sugarman math metaphysics milo.beckman
#654 Up↑ +61/65 Down↓ [Report] 2009-09-11 23:17 EDT

// Second day of school
// Mr. Dibbs hands out a problem sheet
Student: How do you do this question?
*Mr. Dibbs pauses*
Mr. Dibbs (straight-faced): I have no idea.

Tags: dibbs
#744 Up↑ +49/57 Down↓ [Report] 2009-10-13 19:15 EDT

// Physics Class. Student 1 asks what something is.
Student 2: Oh, they were just some old videotapes.
Student 1: Whoa, video tapes? What's a video tape?
Mr. Dreyfus: Are you joking, or am I really that old?

Tags: dreyfus physics video
#1809 Up↑ +56/70 Down↓ [Report] 2011-03-23 17:01 EDT

Mr. Waxman: Some people who are told to come back into the military service don't want to.
Mr. Waxman: So some people go to court and try to fight it.
Mr. Waxman: And others are like, f*** this I'm going to Canada!

Tags: canada waxman
#94 Up↑ +80/100 Down↓ [Report] 2008-09-27 00:25 EDT

Mr. Ku: Find the holes in the graph; where are the hos?
B: In the street!

Tags: hos ku math
#1026 Up↑ +166/176 Down↓ [Report] 2010-02-07 16:20 EST

// Someone is asleep
Mr. Cocoros: Aww....look Ester is tired...
*He takes her pencil case and hides it*
Mr. Cocoros: If I had more time, I would have had all of you file out of class and leave her there.

Tags: ap.calculus.bc cocoros

Stuybash.org

Random Quotes

#28 Up↑ +30/60 Down↓ [Report] 2008-09-22 23:51 EDT

#561 Up↑ +15/41 Down↓ [Report] 2009-05-16 18:32 EDT

#296 Up↑ +150/166 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-20 17:36 EST

#622 Up↑ +50/58 Down↓ [Report] 2009-06-09 16:42 EDT

#1096 Up↑ 0/66 Down↓ [Report] 2010-03-25 20:18 EDT

#719 Up↑ +106/116 Down↓ [Report] 2009-10-04 17:55 EDT

#1129 Up↑ +178/188 Down↓ [Report] 2010-04-11 22:50 EDT

#386 Up↑ +53/69 Down↓ [Report] 2009-02-11 20:46 EST

#1275 Up↑ +15/33 Down↓ [Report] 2010-05-13 20:23 EDT

#1966 Up↑ +45/59 Down↓ [Report] 2011-06-13 22:29 EDT

#654 Up↑ +61/65 Down↓ [Report] 2009-09-11 23:17 EDT

#744 Up↑ +49/57 Down↓ [Report] 2009-10-13 19:15 EDT

#1809 Up↑ +56/70 Down↓ [Report] 2011-03-23 17:01 EDT

#94 Up↑ +80/100 Down↓ [Report] 2008-09-27 00:25 EDT

#1026 Up↑ +166/176 Down↓ [Report] 2010-02-07 16:20 EST